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Casino Spiele

My Tw|t Garden
Wednesday, January 2, 2013
If I had a choice...

That's as good as saying 'maybe...'

And I'm not a person to say that.

What's happened has happened and nothing we say or do would make a difference.

Thinking about what is not possible would only make a person feel worse; never better.

I know that. I'm not gonna start.

Started the new year doing mundane stuff as usual.

But the weight loss seems to be going well.

One day, I'm going to be so skinny again.

And Ian's gonna say I'm pretty everyday.

He asked me on 1st January why I didn't wear pretty clothes; I told him we're not going out, so it's okay that I wear pj at home.

"But I like you to wear pretty clothes. Mummy is very very pretty!"

He's a darling.

Then he called me darling too.

"Because I like you, so I copy mummy say darling!"

I know I lost some weight, but it's not enough yet.

Cos Isaac mentioned I looked fat the other day.

So critical.

Like his daddy.

School starts in another 7-8hours. His first day in primary school.

My mum used to make us fried beancurd with big head onions on our first days of school. So we can top our classes.

Suddenly feel like going out to the supermarket to buy some ingredients for that dish.

Then I remembered I didn't even have to do that. He could easily top his class without superstitious help.

Man, this boy is not easy to raise.

Too smart to tame.

Then there's the bubbly girl.

She's a doll.

And I love her to bits.

Totally see myself in her; all the time.

She runs, she climbs, she falls, she runs and climbs again.

Total fighter spirit.

How not to love her?

This is all of me now. My children.

There is no choice to make...

It's them; or nothing.