Belle is in my arms again. Heavily asleep.
My arms are aching. Lots.
Why do I not let go of the burden that causes me such pain?
Because I know; that if I do, she'd hurt herself. And she is just as helpless as I am.
Being with Belle this one week has taught me many.
Why people love they way they do, why mothers never see their sacrifices as, well, sacrifices.
I don't even think about the future where my kids are expected to return all the love I showered on them.
Not less now, never I think.
Because I'm a willing party.
I have a responsibility to provide, irregardless.
I just wish sometimes, that someone would say that to me.
That he'd provided for me, shelter me during a thunder storm, be my hero and save me when I'm in trouble.
Yes I can managed to save my own ass time and again, that doesn't mean I don't dream of someone doing that for me.
It's a curse to be wise.
Especially when you purposely put it on display.
This part, I've failed miserably.
Where did my wisdom go?
Damn.
Upset.
Max.