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Thursday, November 18, 2010
Getting more tired by the day.
And I'm only mid-way towards delivery date.
The family isn't faring as well as I wanted it to be...
Everyone seems to be down with something.
On top of work, disciplining children, managing my fainting spells and loose stools, I seriously think I've neglected someone important.
He's getting quite weak these days.
And easily agitated.
I try very hard to push myself to do something for him...
Then I realized thereafter that it may not be the kind of loving he desires... or I'm just wasting my time.
I get so tired even without doing anything.
Imagine pushing myself to ignore unpleasant mood swings and catering to physical needs (not really frequently)...
I'm near boiling point.
Becoming vapour.
I know that I'm just thinking too much about myself rather than focusing on his needs.
That's why I feel the heat.
But sometimes I really wished he'd do the same for me...
... reflect on what he's been doing and whether it helps or otherwise.
Some people would simply presume the kind of method they render love to people are normal and would be accepted.
Yet, not all people receive love the same way.
You may be signaling love by doing sweet stuff on the secret to someone... but that someone may not feel the same way.
Sigh.
Human interaction is a difficult chore.
Especially when you have to deal with it day in and out.
Time to do some reflection and improve on my skills...
Sigh.
And I'm only mid-way towards delivery date.
The family isn't faring as well as I wanted it to be...
Everyone seems to be down with something.
On top of work, disciplining children, managing my fainting spells and loose stools, I seriously think I've neglected someone important.
He's getting quite weak these days.
And easily agitated.
I try very hard to push myself to do something for him...
Then I realized thereafter that it may not be the kind of loving he desires... or I'm just wasting my time.
I get so tired even without doing anything.
Imagine pushing myself to ignore unpleasant mood swings and catering to physical needs (not really frequently)...
I'm near boiling point.
Becoming vapour.
I know that I'm just thinking too much about myself rather than focusing on his needs.
That's why I feel the heat.
But sometimes I really wished he'd do the same for me...
... reflect on what he's been doing and whether it helps or otherwise.
Some people would simply presume the kind of method they render love to people are normal and would be accepted.
Yet, not all people receive love the same way.
You may be signaling love by doing sweet stuff on the secret to someone... but that someone may not feel the same way.
Sigh.
Human interaction is a difficult chore.
Especially when you have to deal with it day in and out.
Time to do some reflection and improve on my skills...
Sigh.