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Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Sometimes I wonder if people genuinely like me... Or that they pretend to like me only because they feel threatened.




I know I'm not an easy person to get along with. My standards are sometimes so high... Most humanly possible people fall short of my expectations. Are these good signs? Signs that prove my capabilities? I'm afraid not.




It only goes to show how impossible I am with human beings. How difficult it is to be my friend.




I read somewhere that our thoughts illustrates what would eventually actualize; only because we willed them to happen. Thoughts are powerful tools of magic... Tools that even people don't realize exist.




I am beginning to fully understand the way 'thoughts' work.




It's something like the "self-fulfilling prophecy" that sociologists speak of.




That you create or adopt a behavior by reference to the thought you have... And in turn 'entice' and entrap others to behave as you wanted them to... Thereby fulfilling your 'thought'.




Yes. It's confusing. I know... But makes helluva lot of sense to me.



Since young, I'm skeptical about 'friend's' and what 'friendship' does to sane people. It makes them all girly and mushy and whiney about life, relationship and body weight.




I've no friends. I think that they'll all betray me one day, be it snatching away my lover, cheating me of my money, or telling my enemies my weakest point... I made myself to believe so... And they happened so. Somehow... People around me do that and made me feel all the more justified by my own beliefs.




Scary, but true.




And I don't know how to think otherwise.




Over the years, I'm slowly but surely coming out of that skeptic shell... And am starting to create a new thought within... That making good friends are possible... And that I deserve them. All the goodness of friendship. (not just the bitching...)




Am I seeing results? Maybe... I've earned myself some and lost a lot more.... Who should be the one to judge? I'm not sure. But I know one thing's for sure...




Successful people are not simply intelligent. They succeed because they knew they have the single most powerful tool on earth... And that everyone was born with it; your mind.




If you are still not a convert with regards to this issue at hand; try this simple test (which I've done for at least 20 times for the past 29 years of my freaking life):




Think (aloud/ in your heart) that you will wake up at __am the next day (pls freaking fill in the blank). Tell yourself that you will wake up and repeat this sentence for at least three times - 'i, (name) will wake up at (appointed time) tomorrow.'




Look at the clock and imagine it to be fixed at the time you wanna wake up as you repeat the hypnotic chant.




Believe me, unless your mind is so freaking weak... It will definitely work. Works like a clock, no punts intended.




I did it when I didn't have an alarm clock with me when I was an adolescent. I did it out of curiosity (to see the frequency of it actually working) again when I was older... Many many times... And it works all the time!





The power of the mind... Is amazing.




Then I forgot what I wanna lament about now... Zzzz...