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Casino Spiele

My Tw|t Garden
Saturday, March 27, 2010
Be happy

I dreamt of them the whole freaking night. The pain, the shame, the sadness never left. Sometimes I cover them up so well; even I myself had been convinced that healing is heading somewhere.

What should I do? This is forever. This is unerasable, undeletable, unchangeable.

It didn't hurt her to have seen me, it won't hurt him as much to have seen her... But for me... The reminder, the truth that she was once favoured over me... That she was once his whole life... Chokes me. To death. For eternity.

Everyone is facing some sort of crisis every now and then... And I'm ashamed to say that mine is the least of worries... Remembering that my friends who are going thru even rougher patches is the only thing that calms me down; preventing myself from immersing in self pity.

Death, betrayal, sickness, troubled marriage and troubled relationships... These are the stuffs that I wished I could take off of my friends; since I'm already broken.

Please draw strength from me if you would, please believe that your crisis would pass, please do not sink as low as I have. For the deep entrenched and forgotten well of darkness would never let go if you sank in.

I'm going to prove to you that life is not all that bad. Even if crap happens. Even if everyone seems to put you down, even if death seems iminent.

Be happy in the short life you have. Be happy living as a single, capable person so loved by friends and family, be happy that your bundle of joy will be wiping away your sad tears in a few months, be happy that the dead are in a better place called heaven. Be happy, that that jerk is no longer in your wonderful life.

Be happy, that you have gone thru the worst of all crisis and that the rainbow after the rain would be beautiful.