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Casino Spiele

My Tw|t Garden
Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Yesterday was great. I didn't get angry.

Bad day for the men in the family though...

Chris is sick - down with flu... and very grumpy... surprisingly he was really excellent in making sure he didn't throw tantrums at me, or the kids - by keeping his mouth shut, and trying to smile, hahah...

Isaac just got promoted to nursery two - and he's getting all worked up over his new classroom and new classmates... cried and talked in his sleep last night - words that I can't make any sense out of...

Ian - well, let's just say he's ignorantly blissful of his discomforts thru'out the night that include bedwetting, spitting milk and being woken up by his older brother.

I'm going to digress a little here cos I just remembered something that also happened last night.

Friendship is so hard to maintain.

I don't have this problem because I don't really have a lot of friends... in fact, the closest I have to a chummy buddy is in the form of my husband. Mainly because I have difficulty keeping up and staying in contact with friends I make over the years. I tend to... well... lose them over time.

Chris though... ok... he had his fair share of 猪朋狗友... but the fact that he has successfully maintain contact with a few of his high school classmates - is really worth commending. At least to me I guess.

So last night, there was a little misunderstanding among them and I thought Chris was going to just let it be... but he didn't, and he took the initiative to apologise and clarify things. I didn't know what happened at the other end of the spectrum between the other two guys... but they're both quite dear to me, so I hope things work out.

These guys actually showed me the real value of friendship: that withstand time, conflict and irritating attitudes.

I'm deeply touched, and envious. Is this how all friendships are? Cos the last time I remembered I actually have friends... they sort of made use of me, left me to fend for myself and made me feel like shit. Ever since, I never really made an effort to keep the friends I make.

I sound so amateurish talking about friendship like I don't know a thing. Fact is... I really don't.


I vaguely remembered having lots of birthday presents and people singing birthday songs to me on my birthdays, every year... till I realise how fake these people are... I was thrown aside at the first sign of trouble, left alone at the crossroad of black/white, right/wrong.

I was making merry with some of my 'friends' at a lot of my expenses... and it never occurred to me that they were just taking advantage of my good nature.

Maybe I'm just too critical, or skeptical or pessimistic... but I was really wondering if true friendship really existed... until last night.

It does.

Maybe I wasn't lucky enough.