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My Tw|t Garden
Saturday, December 19, 2009

Thank you for being so understanding...

I know I'm not in my best of mood these days. And you ended up being my punching bag. You took things in your stride. Even though you get frustrated sometimes... you end up being there for me. Still.

Maybe I should be on medication again.

Sometimes... I wonder if I would have been like this if none of these have happened. Would I have become a person dependent on drugs to control my mood? Would I have become a person who'd cry for no reason save that of feeling like it?

I'm puzzled myself.

You said it happened so we can learn to love each other better. Did it also happen so it can prove my vulnerability?

I was so full of confidence... so full of myself... so happy... so positive.

I didn't think anything could put me down. Something did. And I am flabbergasted. I am really a weakling. Nothing else. Simply a weakling.

If only I could pick myself up. How do people pick up their pieces? My only safe bet? Through love and prayers. I trust I would. Eventually.

Maybe... God had intended to expose my vulnerability so I could embrace true love. The only way to enjoy love, is to be vulnerable.

Faith is something really powerful. If I can't trust again, I'd give you my faith in you.

I have faith... that we'd make it through this life together.