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Tuesday, November 10, 2009
Life
I'm like 3kg away from my ideal weight.
And I'm very satisfied with my performance so far.
I suppose five years down the road when I read my blog entries (yes, I read my old blog entries to reflect) I'd be flabbergasted by my own crazy desire to look stick-thin and gaunt-like. Still, it proves one thing - I have not recovered.
Chris was right, I may want to look skinny because I wish to be better. Better in all aspects - work, life, social, love, even the looks department.
He told me I'm in every way more beautiful than so-and-so, and I was deeply grateful and touched.
But I still cannot get pass my own conscience - that I look absolutely fat and ugly.
Maybe one day, I'll wake up all rid of this silly notion, I wonder how long it'll take.
I've already lost the confidence I had before. This kind of thing breaks me, breaks my confidence and kills whatever faith I have in myself.
Then someone said something one day that made me realize one thing...
... that life doesn't break you, its up to you whether you want to be broken or continue to stay alive. Whatever fate has in store for you, you cannot control, but you can choose to make it better or worse.
I hope people would realize this and make better lives out of their current ones.
Cheers.
And I'm very satisfied with my performance so far.
I suppose five years down the road when I read my blog entries (yes, I read my old blog entries to reflect) I'd be flabbergasted by my own crazy desire to look stick-thin and gaunt-like. Still, it proves one thing - I have not recovered.
Chris was right, I may want to look skinny because I wish to be better. Better in all aspects - work, life, social, love, even the looks department.
He told me I'm in every way more beautiful than so-and-so, and I was deeply grateful and touched.
But I still cannot get pass my own conscience - that I look absolutely fat and ugly.
Maybe one day, I'll wake up all rid of this silly notion, I wonder how long it'll take.
I've already lost the confidence I had before. This kind of thing breaks me, breaks my confidence and kills whatever faith I have in myself.
Then someone said something one day that made me realize one thing...
... that life doesn't break you, its up to you whether you want to be broken or continue to stay alive. Whatever fate has in store for you, you cannot control, but you can choose to make it better or worse.
I hope people would realize this and make better lives out of their current ones.
Cheers.